
What do you do for a living?
Today we bring you an awesome guest post from RJ, a fellow blogger at Saving For A Living. He and his wife have only 4 months, 1 week, and 5 days left before they reach FI (Financial Independence); and only a couple years left before they RE (Retire Early)!
Without further ado….
What do you do for a living?
When you think of it “what do you do for a living?” is essentially like asking “what do you do for money?”. It’s become a pretty standard and acceptable question in our society and is almost one of the first few questions you ask a person you meet (after how’s the weather and how about these gas prices…).
Today I’ll discuss this very question and how we’ve had to and will have to deal with it once we quit our jobs.
In the past year, my wife and I have been sharing our plans with more and more people. The fact that we plan on leaving the big city and moving to a small town. The plan to be mortgage free and not work 9-5 and spend way more time with our kids and doing the things we love.
Then I get these: “But how will you keep your current job?”, “What will you do for a living?” or “How will you make enough money to live?”. And then sometimes, “Won’t you be bored?”.
I know that what we are doing appears really strange to most people but it can’t feel any more normal to us. I can explain our plan in detail and sometimes people still assume we will keep working in our industries but on a part time basis.
The plan, if all goes well would be to not work in our current industries. Our current jobs are not something we are passionate about. We are good at it and make good incomes doing what we do but it’s not something we love doing, or even like doing.
Through this process we’ve also realized that our ambitions are far greater than what we can accomplish by working for someone else.
Career Identity
I think this questions stems from the fact that most people draw so much of their identity in their profession (i.e. Accountant, Insurance Professional) and people just assume that we will want to hold on to that identity. As if we value some sort career status. The short answer is we don’t…
This wasn’t always the case. Ten years ago this type of question would sound perfectly logical to me. Whatever changes I would adopt in my life, I could not imagine not having a career or a job to be proud of.
It was part of my identity. I wanted to be known as a successful career man. I wanted to climb the corporate ladder and be a President or a CEO one day.
So what changed my goals? It sounds cliché to say that my kids changed my life but I can’t think of any other reason. When my son was born, a switch went off in my head. All of a sudden, I just didn’t see a future as a Vice-President or Director or President of anything…
I thought about this for a long time and I came to realize that all I wanted to be known for was being a father and a husband. If I looked back on my life when I’m 90, and was known as an amazing dad and husband, I would have lived the exact life I wanted.
So in essence, the job/career/position didn’t matter in my life equation anymore… other than a way to make money to accomplish the greater life goal.
I think having amazing parents obviously helped in shaping my new perspective. My parents both worked extremely hard their entire life in traditional jobs. But they definitely won’t be known for their careers when they’re 90. Their greatest accomplishment and greatest contribution to the world was raising 4 outstanding members of society.
My Ideal Full Time Job
I’m always daydreaming of what my ideal full time job would be. What will I do everyday with all my time once I quit my job? I anticipate that it will start by getting up at the same time as we normally do (around 6AM) but that will probably be the only thing that stays the same.
Once we’re up we won’t be in a rush to all get ready, eat quickly, get the kids dressed
up when they are really cranky. Then stuffing them in the car to make it to daycare/work on time…
I will get up and enjoy a peaceful and quiet cup of coffee while I journal and plan what amazing things I would like to accomplish during that day. Then when the kids wake up, my “job” (that I love) starts.
I will make the whole family a great breakfast, eat with them and we will discuss what is on the itinerary for today. Most of my day will be dedicated to giving them 10x more one-on-one attention.
I will also make an even greater effort to come up with ways to make my wife’s day the best, every single day.
So…What do you do for a living?
So what do I say when people ask “what are you going to do for a living?” or once we are FI and people ask “what do you do for a living?”. I thought of saying something like “we are property managers, or we are entrepreneurs…”. But the more I think about it, I don’t like those answers.
When I face that exact question, I will answer, “I’m a father and a husband for a living…, and if you have a few minutes I’ll gladly explain how we make money. I can share how much of it we actually need to live an extremely happy life. But it’s not the quick 2 second answer you’re used to receiving…”
Afterwards I will direct them to check out all the amazing FI blogs out there so they may also be awakened to this amazing idea.
RJ and his wife D are on a journey to become full time parents. He and his wife have only 4 months, 1 week, and 5 days left before they reach FI (Financial Independence); and only a couple years left before they RE (Retire Early)! Their goal is to quit working full time and spend the majority of their time raising their kids. Their blog Saving For A Living shares the steps they are taking to get there as well as provides very useful tips and advice to create your own plan. Make sure you pay their blog a visit. Thanks
What about you guys? When do you plan to reach FI/RE? What do you do currently? And what will you be telling people when they ask what you do for a living once you FIRE?
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31 responses
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[…] What do you do for a living? […]
In our culture, it is so engrained in us to identify as what our profession is. If you aren’t working 40+ hours a week, you are seen as unmotivated, uninspired, lazy, etc.
It is so refreshing to see people shunning this unhealthy and unrealistic expectation, and living their lives the best way for THEM.
Bravo on your accomplishments, and for being an example to others that they can be free to live life fully, too.
Thanks! Being a parent is a 40+ hours a week job in itself
Yes, here’s to bringing the sexy (financial independence) back 🙂
I super love this!!! I can relate to people thinking we are strange. Chris had to fill out his occupation for renewing his passport. He had to think for a minute on what to write! I like idea of identifying yourself first as a parent and spouse! Best wishes on your journey to FI!
Thanks Jaime! I’d love to see if we could write that on a passport application. lol
Interesting, I forgot they ask about that when getting a passport. What would happen if you put retired, FIREd, jobless…They would probably do more background check on you? 🙂
Hi RJ –
Thanks for the post and for sharing your thoughts. Congratulations on your progress.
It’s great that you’re able to create your own lifestyle and define its terms to reflect what is most important to you. I’ll be following your site going forward.
Thanks for sharing again.
Thanks Mike! I appreciate it!
Thanks Mike.
Keep in mind you will need a new answer when the kids grow up if they move far from you which is often the case. Just saying husband won’t sound quite right? Fatherhood with grown kids while early retired, my life, is very very part time at best. I alternate between saying I’m retired, which seems untrue since I’m earning six figures and saying I’m a consultant seems wrong when I maybe work 16 hours a week? I’m still looking for a great sound bite answer.
Great point. I thought about that too. I guess then I can just say I’m retired…lol
Hey Steve, sounds like a good problem to have. Btw, let us know if you would like to guest post about how you are able to make 6 figures working only 16hrs/week! #Goals 😊
Sure, I could do that. I’m kind of a niche player but I did plan things out way in advance so there might be something in it for others.
Perfect!!! Just sent you an email.
Love this quote “I came to realize that all I wanted to be known for was being a father and a husband.” Not everybody needs to become a CEO to live the life they want. Great guest post!!!!
Thanks Jason!
So true. You can be the CEO of your household if you want to 😊
Excellent. We can relate to this path you’ve taken. When our twins came along, almost five years ago, it changed EVERYTHING.
We’re now in a position to retire early in less than two years. I expect at social gathering I can say “I do real estate” since I intend to focus my energies on our fledgling rental empire of five properties. Nice post – and best of luck!
You guys are killing it! How many properties you plan to own?
I think the question “Won’t you be bored?” and the idea of Career Identity are the only ones that make sense for those in the know about FI. The “What do you do for money? / “How will you make enough money to live?” questions have a bit obvious answer to the FI community – for the most part, we don’t make money, our money makes money.
My first child is due in April so I have a feeling my world is going to change very quickly very soon… I already don’t have enough time for everything I want to do, so I’ve been saving every little bit I can today so I can spend more time with the little guy later!
Oh wow congratulations!!! Boy or girl?
Your time management strategy sounds like a good one.
Boy. We’re excited!
Yes, so excitinggggg. Congratulations again!
Great guest post!
The question “won’t you be bored?” just shows a lack of creativity. Kind of sad to hear that when there are so many interesting things to do in the world. I can’t wait to be “bored” so I can put all of my time into whatever catches my interest.
Congrats on being so close to FIRE!
Yeah, there’s so much to do and so little time even when FIREd.
Great Post! Congratulations on being so close to FIRE. I’m looking forward to that day.
Looking forward to that day too 🙂
Great post. It’s really a “generational” thing (or it tends to be). I applaud your efforts and bravery. Being the oldest of 8 kids myself, my older siblings tend not to get it. If someone can figure out how to support themselves on their own terms, how could you not support that? I’m sure you’re going to have an exciting and productive FIRE.
I agree, if you can support yourself, it’s none of their business 🙂
When did this become standard and acceptable? This is a personal question and I don’t feel comfortable telling complete strangers person things about myself.
Why not also tell them where I live, where my car is parked and my cell phone pin number also?